How to Speak with Children About Divorce

When you are going through a divorce, it is easy to become distracted by your own emotions and forget that your children are being effected as well.

Linda Hassan Anderson, Vice President of KinderCare, wrote a blog which highlights what parents should do when talking with children about divorce.  Among her suggestions were the following tips:

  1. Talk to your children together. Approaching your children about your divorce through a united front will show the children that even if you are not able to continue the marriage, you are able to continue co-parenting your children.
  2. Consider the timing and place you tell your children about the divorce.  They will remember the conversation and how they were told, so a private and familiar location is best.
  3. Answer the questions that you can.  You may not have an answer for everything the children are concerned or confused about, but be on the same page with how you will answer questions.  Less is more when it comes to the details of your divorce, however honest simple answers can help the children process what is going on.
  4. Give your children space and time to process, while still checking with them.  The children will also experience many different emotions throughout the divorce process and after, so it is important to acknowledge and assure the children that it is okay for them to have the feelings that they are experiencing.  If your children experience depression or just need someone outside of the family to speak with, counseling or therapy may be a helpful outlet for them.

Following the above tips and assuring your children that you love them, may help ease the pain of the divorce the process and help the children adjust.  For assistance on how, when and what to tell your children regarding your divorce, it is worth considering meeting with a child specialist or co-parent counselor.

Additionally, if you wish to speak with an attorney to help you navigate your divorce, please contact our office at 414-258-1644 to schedule a free initial office consultation or visit our website for more information.


We welcome your comments or questions. We will do our best to try to respond. However, please be advised that we cannot give legal advice in this forum and all communications are for general informational purposes only. Communication should not be construed as forming an attorney-client relationship. This is an open forum and any information you provide may be posted and will not be held confidentially. By posting a comment or question, you are expressly giving consent for the publication of same. If you have any specific legal issues or concerns, we always recommend that you consult with an attorney in the county and state in which you reside.

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